I don't give a bleep about new slot machines

I don't gamble, however if I go to Vegas or Reno occasionally I enjoy playing the slot machines. What has happened to the slot machines? Whose bright idea was it to create "penny machines?" These machines are such a rip -off. We all know 100 pennies equal one dollar. So why is it that in order to really get any returns off of these penny machines you have to put in about $5.00?

I miss the "one arm bandit." The feel of power when you pulled that handle and let er rip! What a rush. The lights flashing, flashing, man this was one orgasmic feeling when you heard that wonderful sound of all the lights flashing, indicating a big payoff. The sound of the clinking coins was so surreal.



I know most of the machines still give you the choice of pulling the handles, but now the clinking is replaced with a little slip of paper-with the denomination you have won. Such an injustice.



It takes me half the night to read the rules on the slot machines, that by the time I finally understand the game, it is time to close up the darn casino.

I want my OLD machines back. I want my one- arm bandits back. I want to carry my buckets around and show off all the way to the cash out machine. If someone even thinks of robbing me I will just take one of my rolled up coins and knock them out. God the good old days

I don''t give a bleep about rude people on cell phones

Currently I don't have a computer at home. This means I have to do these posts at the library. There is this big sign that says, " Please be courteous and turn your cell phones off." So what happened today, this lady sitting next to me decides this was a truck stop or something. Not only was she on her cell phone, she was loud, using profanity and eating.

I guess if you are going to break the rules, you should go all the way. I tolerated her for about 10 minutes before I -politely- asked her to please lower her voice. Did you notice I did not ask her to get off the phone, stop eating or stop cursing. Simply to lower her voice.

Of course "homechick" had to act stupid. She got louder, rolled her eyes, and continued her behaviour. I then had to go to the librarian and state my complaint. Long and short of this story, the lady was asked to leave. I found out I was not the only one who complained.

I mean at what point did you not realize you were in a library, that there were young kids there and you were making a fool of yourself.

A similar situation happened when I was at the movie theater. A person on their cell phone, telling the entire movie to a friend. I didn't say anything to this person, but someone else in the theater did. Wow, that was more exciting (the exchange) then the movie.

There was a law passed and you are NOT (in some states) suppose to be talking on your cell phone while driving -texting as well. This is so inconsiderate as well as dangerous. I can go on and on, but I suppose someone will add more observations about bad Cell phone etiquette.

Leave Michael Jackson Alone

Good Grief, the man is dead people. It is interesting how someone who is artistically a musical genuis can have so many hateful things stated about in death. Was Michael eccentic? yes Was he a peodiophile? I don't know- I wasn't there. After a lengthy trial, we have folks who rendered a verdict that says he wasn't.

I read one blog- Mexica Movement- where the caption is "Born Black, Died White." I hate to break the news to these people but changing your skin complexion does not change your ethniticity. The most hateful blog-in my opinion- was a post done on HUFFINGTON POST (need I say more)- the headline reads, "Michael Jackson couldn't sing, was gay and died skeletal."

It says a lot about folks that love ratings. I remember the Jackson 5/Jacksons and the wonderful joy their music brought to the world. How many people do you know that the world would grieve for. Since Michael's Jackson's sudden and unexpected death there has been a surge in demand for his recordings and memorabilia. This has included hundreds of items including albums, posters and T-shirts have been listed on auction Web site eBay. And sales of his recordings have skyrocketed in shops and on music download sites.

Let his family, and kids grieve in peace. As I stated earlier I choose to remember the -Artist- A man whose music brought a smile to my face.

I don't give a bleep about fitness centers

These places drain your money and soul. Okay, they know we want to lose weight, wheter for health reasons, dating or just so our boobs don't hang to the ground-so what do they do offer these great promotions and then get us with the hidden fees.

"No long-term contract. No excuses. Our new easy monthly payment plans help you get the body you want with the convenience you deserve. Commit to yourself, not a contract" (courtesy of bally total fitness)

Now for many of us who like me fell for the NO LONG TERM CONTRACT and EASY MONTHLY PAYMENTS now realize we have made this deal with the devil. They know my butt ain't getting up EVERYDAY to excercise. They also know they have my credit card (much like Netflix). I get to the gym (doesn't matter what time) always crowded, I can't get to my favorite treadmill, yada yada.







I had decided to forget about the excercise centers and just WALK. It is FREE and I can do it anytime I want. I don't have to wait for Ramon to get his sweaty balls off the stepper.

...why don't folks WIPE down the equipment. The towel should NOT be a decoration around your neck.

...So no more MONEY to these fitness centers. I am going to walk, eat more healthy, and pick my drooping breasts up off the ground and just be the sexy person I know I am!

I don't give a bleep about bad drivers

What is wrong with folks? Did they get their driving license out of a cereal box? People you cannot, let me repeat, cannot stop your vehicle on a "FREEWAY!"...hello? anyone home?

So today I am on my way to an appointment. I am in the middle lane, because I get away from the fast folks (fast lane) and don't have to curse out the slow folks (slow lane). I am just driving along when suddenly this gentleman in front of me stops his vehicle...Yup just stopped like he was on crack or something. I quickly had to jump over in the next lane because I saw the crash coming.

Sadly the fool that was "tailgating" me for over a mile ran into him. Luckily no injuries. I pulled over on the shoulder and watched, because if the guy behind me needed a witness I would happily volunteer. So folks swerving like crazy, then here come CHP (CHIPS) with sirens blazing.

It seems the man in front of me was "texting" and lost concentration and instead of accelerating, put his foot on the brakes. WHAT? texting. Texting is the devils device, I am convinced. (wait that is my next rant for my next post).

Okay, no one seems to even be looking my way (by then they started setting up roadblocks) ambulance is called, (I guess this is a common thing when there is a collision). So I decided to just be on my way to my appointment.

I am so sick of inconsiderate drivers, the ones the cut you off, drag race through the neighborhood, don't use their blinkers (turn signals), run stop signs and BOY OH BOY can I go on.

sigh...well if this is the most excitement I have for today, I will be okay.

I don't give a bleep-about folks who pick their nose

I am laughing because I remember the Seinfield episode where the whole show was about someone who "wasn't" picking their nose, but folks thought they were. Okay, there is a way people to DO this without the DIG EM out approach. (you know the folks I am talking about).

Nose-picking is an extremely common habit, with some surveys indicating that it is almost universal, with people picking their nose an average of about four times a day.

In The Lion King 1½, there is a scene in which Pumbaa exits the cinema to get some snacks. While he is gone, Timon starts picking his nose humming It's a Small World. Pumbaa then comes back and Timon quickly wipes the evidence on a chair. Pumbaa asks "Were you just picking your nose?" to which Timon replies "No, I had an itch on the inside.

So as you see this is quite common. I mean the nose is the largest orifice on our face. (well mine is anywa- danggone genes).

Then we have the double threat. The ones who pick their nose and then commence to pulling their undewear out their crevice. I mean isn't their a discreet way to do this.

We have someone here at work who constantly picks her nose. It is annoying. She will be in your face talking to you and digging away. Why? I have no clue. I mean if you must do it-get a kleenix and then "discreetly", keep in mind I said "discreetly" put the tissue in the offending orifice. (then digg away).

I don't give a bleep about Bad Kids

Wow, what is with these parents who let their kids run amuck in the grocery stores? Their were these two kids today who thought the aisles were skating rinks. They were racing shopping carts up and down the aisles. The parents just seemed to be oblivious to this.

I wanted to go over and smack the living bejesus out of them, but I restrained myself.

What is so funny

I should of did this picture for "Wordless Wednesday." I wonder what this Kitty is thinking. Probably just ate a whole family of mice an cracking up or trying to not regurgitate them.

I don't give a bleep about- Sex Aid Commericals

What is wrong with folks? Every time I turn on the television they have these commericals showing folks how to have "pleasurable" sex with these new "products."

Oh and now they got the ExtenZE Penis Enlargement commerical on the cartoon network? Huh? What is wrong with these advertisers? Don't they have children? Is it all about money?







and then we have to deal with that damn BOB? Now you know (well most men know) if they have a hard on for 24 hours that would NOT be pleasurable. More then likely they would seek medical help. But not BOB. Bob would smile if he was burnt with the coffee he was holding.

I hate this commerical. It is so stupid.

I don't give a bleep about- Eyebrow Threading

Eye brow threading? What is it you ask? Well I can tell you that is some painful mess! I have heard some folks get it and they didn't even know the person had finished. Well what happens? I get it and I was in a world of hurt.
Eyebrow threading is a depilation technique which originated in India, although it is also widely practiced in the Middle East. Salons in America offer the service to to American women.Threading can be used to remove other facial and body hair as well.

I can just imagine a hairy face women requesting this procedure. I am sure it would take a lot of thread. I hate doing my hairbrows period, but it is do them or look like grizzly Adams sister. (and that ain't happening)

The chick that did my brows did not look that menacing but honey-chile when she got to yanking the hairs out with that thread, dang, my tears couldn't even come I just cried inside.

This is what I felt like doing

In The Hospital

It has been quite some time since I have ventured on this blog. I have been in the hospital and have had other medical things dealing with. I pondered long and hard wether I should just let this go, because writing and having difficulty breathing do not go hand in hand.

I thank many of you that have supported me since the inception of this blog.

I can't promise my subcribers I will write every "DAY," but I will now be able to write more frequently.

I don't Give a Bleep about Tax Time

I HATE DOING TAXES DAGNANBIT!!..whoooa...okay got that off my chest. I did my Federal tax early cause I wanted my refund. Now here I am doing my State Tax an I don't owe anything but the damn Turbo Tax software wants to try and charge me $39.99.. FOR WHAT? Did I not just say I don't owe a damn thing!

What are we paying taxes for any way, Schools Suck, the Roads Suck, Education Sucks, Hospitals Suck, The whole transportation system sucks, Airports Suck...and just writing is causing my hand to cramp up sucks!

I found this on "clean jokes Site" it is funny (a bit long but worth the read).
\

Note: Sometimes a story comes along that needs no polishing or enhancement to make it better. This is one of those. It is a real letter submitted to the IRS the midst of 1995s weird and bizarre denial of dependents, exemptions and credits. The letter speaks for itself.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Dear Sirs:

I am responding to your letter denying the deduction for two of the three dependents I claimed on my 1994 Federal Tax return. Thank you!

I have questioned whether or not these are my children for years. They are evil and expensive. It's only fair that, since they are minors and no longer my responsibility, the government should know something about them and what to expect over the next year. Please do not try to reassign them to me next year and reinstate the deduction. They are yours!

The oldest, Kristen, is now 17. She is brilliant. Ask her! I suggest you put her to work in your office where she can answer people's questions about their returns. While she has no formal training, it has not seemed to hamper her mastery of any subject you can name. Taxes should be a breeze. Next year she is going to college. I think it's wonderful that you will now be responsible for that little expense. While you mull that over, keep in mind that she has a truck. It doesn't run at the moment, so you have the choice of appropriating some Department of Defense funds to fix the vehicle, or getting up early to drive her to school. Kristen also has a boyfriend. Oh joy! While she possesses all of the wisdom of the universe, her alleged mother and I have felt it best to occasionally remind her of the virtues of abstinence, or in the face of overwhelming passion, safe sex. This is always uncomfortable, and I am quite relieved you will be handling this in the future. May I suggest that you reinstate Dr. Jocelyn Elders who had a rather good handle on the problem.

Patrick is 14. I've had my suspicions about this one. His eyes are a little closer together than those of normal people. He may be a tax examiner himself
one day, if he is not incarcerated first. In February, I was awakened at three in the morning by a police officer who was bringing Pat home. He and his
friends were TP'ing houses. In the future, would you like him delivered to the local IRS office, or to Ogden, UT? Kids at 14 will do almost anything on a
dare. His hair is purple. Permanent dye, temporary dye, what's the big deal? Learn to deal with it. You'll have plenty of time, as he is sitting out a few
days of school after instigating a food fight in the cafeteria. I'll take care of filing your phone number with the vice-principal. Oh yes, he and all of his friends have raging hormones. This is the house of testosterone and it will be much more peaceful when he lives in your home. DO NOT leave him or his
friends unsupervised with girls, explosives, inflammables, inflatables, vehicles, or telephones. (They find telephones a source of unimaginable amusement. Be sure to lock out the 900 and 976 numbers!)

Heather is an alien. She slid through a time warp and appeared as if by magic one year. I'm sure this one is yours. She is 10 going on 21. She came from a bad trip in the sixties. She wears tie-dyed clothes, beads, sandals, and hair that looks like Tiny Tim's. Fortunately you will be raising my taxes to help offset the pinch of her remedial reading courses. "Hooked On Phonics" is expensive, so the schools dropped it. But here's the good news! You can buy it yourself for half the amount of the deduction that you are denying me! It's quite obvious that we were terrible parents (ask the other two). She cannot speak English. Most people under twenty understand the curious patois she fashioned out of valley girls/boys in the hood/reggae/yuppie/political double speak. The school sends her to a speech pathologist who has her roll her "r's". It added a refreshing Mexican/Irish touch to her voice. She wears hats backwards, baggy pants, and wants one of her ears pierced four more times. There is a fascination with tattoos that worries me, but I am sure that you can handle it. Bring a truck when you come to get her, she sort of "nests" in her room and I think that it would be easier to move the entire thing than find out what it is really made of.

You denied two of the three exemptions, so it is only fair that you get to pick which two you will take. I prefer that you take the youngest two, I will still
go bankrupt with Kristen's college, but then I am free! If you take the two oldest, then I still have time for counseling before Heather becomes a teenager. If you take the two girls, then I won't feel so bad about putting Patrick in a military academy. Please let me know of your decision as soon as possible, as I have already increased the withholding on my W-4 to cover the $395 in additional tax and made a down payment on an airplane.

Yours truly,
Bob

I don't Give a Bleep about not eating Carbs

STOP TELLING ME TO STOP EATING CARBS..I love carbs. Why are folks so worried about what "others" are saying about them. I love Carbs, Carbs are my friends and Idon'tgiveableep who doesn't like the fact I am eating them.

I feel like a couch potato today

Below is a picture of my dream date. God I love this guy, He so fine. He is very "sweet" on me..Don't hate, congratulate

Praying for the Recession to End

This Recession has "everyone" praying

Watery Wednesday

The Lake

Click on the image above and show some love to the other participants

Mellow Yellow Monday

These look good enough to eat, however they are very poisonous berries. I spotted them on my walking trail

Click on the image above to view the other participants

These are just some strange pictures

Okay, who is driving, Chiquita banana?



This poor man is a victim of the economy, he can't even afford to pay for a moving van



Wait, and they say, "Americans are Crazy"..er...


I have ridden the New York City Transportation System (known as the Subway)...they really do have some comfortable floors

.

THis is just some wrong stuff. Why doesn't she put milk in that bottle for that hungry baby?

Grandma's Don't Give A Bleep

old drivers -get out the way

Lord forgive me, I know I am going to be old one day, but PULEEEZE get these old folks off the freeway. I was on my way to the store this morning and I almost got into and accident cause, "grandma" had her head way down in the car looking for something...(on the FREEWAY no less), and did not see me merging in her lane and I signaled like a three car length..I had to swerve over in the other lane or I might not be here today. I mean she was totally oblivious of the situation..and looked over at me and smiled...WTH?

Hmmm...come to think of it "Granny" might have been very competent. I feel that once you reach a certain age the DMV needs to do a yearly check see if they are still able to function on the road.

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Watery Wednesday

looking over the railing, but I just love the way the sun seemed to be dancing on the water



click image below to view more participants..

More of my marina shots..

I Don't Give a Bleep About Artificial Sweetners

Why are there so many artificial sweetners...arrgh! I went to my favorite pancake house, "International House of Pancakes," and asked for a cup of cofee. My goodness she brings back this huge mug with about 10 different sweetners. Some I wasn't even aware of. I guess the latest thing is to have "cane sugar" as a sweetner. I don't know if I-Hop is competing with Starbucks but this as absolutely ridiculous.

You ever read the ingriedients on a unsweetened soda bottle label? I mean there are words in there that I can say much less spell. Why do the sugar free sodas always taste so darn sweet.

I see why I a saving calories. They trying to give me Cancer and kill my butt.




Thank God we are now starting to have consumers reject diet soda. Diet soda stands at the center of America’s passion for soft drinks.It seems however, that studies suggesting the toxic nature of its many sweeteners, lackluster advertising, and an increased health consciousness in the United States have done little to stop its growth. Even though some are opting for a more healthier beverage many of you out there still chug your, "diet pepsi" or "diet coke."

These damn advertisizers that are shoveling these commercials down our throat don't give a rat's behind about your health.

I tam telling you the only way to go is drinking a free drink called, "WATER!"

Watery Wednesday

This is the marina that is within 10 minutes walking distance from my house


These are the boats by the Marina.

Please click on the image below to view the other Watery Wednesday participants

Here is my Watery Wednesday entry. This is the first time Idon'tgiveableep is doing this meme.

Happy Saint Patrick's Day

I Don't Give a Bleep About Breast Feeding Men

What in the hell is this kind of nastiness.

I Don't Give A Bleep About New York Taxi Cabs

I am mad about these dang gone Taxi drivers in New York City that don't know where the Hell they are going. My sister just called me from New York and was telling me that she called a taxi to take her from long island to Brooklyn. Now if you are a New Yorker you know that there really is one true straight shot...but this dude must of thought she was a tourist and want to show her the whole damn city before he take her to Linden Blvd.

She told me she was screaming at him to turn here, turn there an he was just ignoring her. Then when he stopped the cab he wanted to charge her "rent money!" WTF? I lived in New York for over 17 years and even though some things have changed, a lot of things have not.

When he finally reached, she flew out the cab. The man was yelling,"you ain't paying," I am calling the cops. She flipped him off and told them him call them, because when they look at the meter they are not going to believe you picked me up in Brentwood. She said he kinda muttered something and then drove off.

Now they have this thing called, "Cash Cabs." It is a game show and you jump into a cab only to find out you are game show called, "Cash Cab." The host is this dude called, "Ben Bailey." Then the lights come on and scare the BeJeus outta yah. Now if I am in a hurry to get to work, don't be scaring me in your taxi. Then I pee pee myself and your show gotta cleaning bill..it is just too crazy.

Then their is this other crazy show, that use to come on HBO, "taxicab confessions." This is a show where folks want to just tell all their bidness. I think folks use taxi cabs as confessionals.

What is up with these weird bras?

What in the world is this crap?









Why is it glowing? I mean it isn't going to stay on long








I don't know about this bra, aren't his hands cold?




I wonder if that is real rice?




And the weirdest thing I have ever seen


MAN BRAS!!


only in Japan...

I Don't Give a Bleep About-Customer Service Reps

How does that song start, "Where do I begin, to tell the story..." Customer Service Representatives, is this what happens when the GED system in America goes array. Don't get me wrong we have some wonderful people out there who have not only perfected the art of wonderful customer service but make you feel like you are getting a warm massage when you interact with them.

Sadly it is the "others" that make the good ones all but get lost in the sauce. I could (and I am sure others can as well) tell a million horror stories involving a customer service experience.

However, I found this YOUTUBE clip that describes it best for me.



This clip is from MadTV and although fictional in nature (but hellah funny), it doesn't fall from from the truth. How can you SCREW up a BURGER KING ORDER.....dang!

Idon'tgiveableep about infomercials

There you are can't sleep so you turn on the televison and bam!...there is an infomercial about male enhancement drugs.You turn the channel and there is another commerical about some sharp knives that can cut through your car.

If you want to get your stuff seen wouldn't you air it during regular programing time?

If I see one more SNUGGY commerical I am gonna scream. Why would a grown ass man wear a blanket with arms?



And check out this one. Here is Mighty Putty, as opposed to silly putty. This putty can hold any weight, perhaps even your car. I have learned to watch DVD's instead of television for my insomnia.

What in DA BLEEP?

Folks Please stop mistreating your animals